12.50....

12.50 am now, I just slept about 4 hours last night, and awake until now..... It's about 20 hours that I din't lay on my bed and take a really good rest. Out of sudden, I have so many stuff to express. I am feeling headache and my brain gonna explore soon, but still I am here to write just because I couldn't forget how the drama inspired me.

I knew, tomorrow would be my very first day to college, I should be get myself ready and adjust my routine again, but, there's something really important for me to settle down now. Many years ago, I think it would be the time that I started to have my own ability to judge on something, I always thought that I knew and understand myself very well and I always thought that I can handle everything perfectly but I realized something after I watched the drama, it inspired me so much, I don't even think that every words that exist in the world could explain my feeling now.

I need a chance, just one more chance for myself to redo my life's story. My life is not under my control, a lot of unexpected stuff entered into my life. It really mess up, the story shouldn't goes like this. I alway want everything to be perfect, including my life, but when I personally thought that it going smooth and perfect, actually it's not. It's worse.....especially my love stories and my upbringing.

Nobody is perfect, but I wish I could be the one who closer to "perfect". So, I changed my entire plan and I had made a new decision for my life. It's time to change and made better improvement.

That's all for tonight. Sweet dream everyone.

Broken Heart

Sometimes I really feel like I am so lost and I got no confident at all. I lack of confident about all the things that I do, all the people I loves and everything that related to me. I got no idea why, I just don't feel the same way that other girls do, they alway think that everything they had are inevitable, but I really don't, I can't afford losing the one I really love, so I choose to hide, choose to give up earlier so that they won't get hurt at the future.

But my thought was totally wrong, still, they get hurt and depress on me. I can't explain why I did this to them, I always feel that all the things that belong to me right now is actually not belong to me, I'm not deserve all these thingy. And, my mind will tell me that they could deserve a better one. I know I am definitely ridiculous but I just couldn't control my mind stop thinking about this. Where's my confident goes? Sigh

Something happened last night, I din't mean to hurt him for telling him all the ridiculous stuff but I feel that I am not good enough for him, he could deserve a better one. I really felt guilty and things getting worse after I told him, broken his heart and hurting him. Gosh! What I am thinking and doing? Why am I keep thinking about the negative of myself? I am not tender, not caring, not smart, not pretty, bad attitude, shit personality. All these negative thought split into my mind and I will think that why they love me? I know nobody is perfect but too bad, I am the worst one.

Confident Confident Confident, where you've been? Why am I keep hurting the one I love without any reason? Ishh, my friends alway tell me, "do not think the negative way, there must be a reason why they love you, trust yourself and be confident" awwwwww.... I really hope I could stop thinking too much and stop hurting the one I love.

Ps: Dear, I apologize for last night, I <3 you and I always do ^^

Fight with time!

Morning everyone. No more time for me to waste, It must goes rapidly. Okay now, here's my plan:

12p.m- 3p.m: study
3pm-5p.m: take a nap
5p.m to 6p.m: study
6p.m-7p.m: dinner
7p.m-9p.m: study
9pm-9.30p.m: watch tv
9.30pm: sleep

Kathrine GO GO GO~!! <3
PS: I miss my dear...<3

I apologize for the inconvenience

I'm so so so sorry and feel guilty too. Since morning until now, I din't text him, never ever give him a call due to some inconvenience. I sincerely apologize here, I really hope that he'll forgive me. Sorry dear, it's my bad. >.<"

I know he's worry about me when I received his call just now. Even though he keep blaming on me. But I know he's care . <3 It sound like I'm not a responsible gf but I sincerely apologize here.... forgive me dear....

Phew,Left Law of tort now. Things getting better, but still have to check out all the cases and the questions which consider in the Lee Mei Pheng's reference book. The most important part would be the Articles and the years. Couldn't remember well but I will try my best. Well, nothing special today, so I'm gonna end here.

Good night & Sleep Tight everyone <3

Things getting right :)

The strawberries that I ate this afternoon, Tasty~

uhhemm, today is a great day so far. I woke up at 9.30A.M. Had my breakfast at around 11A.M and get myself ready for study at 12.30P.M. I'm trying so hard to concentrate and pay more attention in my study. Thus, things getting better, I had studied Law of contract, English law and Malaysian law. All these topics are quite easy for me as my lecturer had put so much effort to explaining and doing the notes for us. Even though they're too simplify but easy to understand. Haha.

I like the way he treat me so far. Reporting what he's doing, text me at the appropriate time, the most important thing is he give me freedom. Hope everything will go fine. On the other hand, my sweetheart baby's birthday coming soon and yet my baby Shirnie and me are planning what kind of surprise we suppose to give her. It definitely would be something interesting. xD

I realised that all my previous posts were surrounded by study study study. Study make me look dull and ark and exhaust and stress but still, I'm going to write about my study journal until my exam end but then I am trying to write something new and interesting too. So, catch up with my post everyday yo~ xD that's all with today, thank you for spending your precious time to read this post. ^^

Night night~

Treat it as a Drug Addiction

Woke up at 10am today, feel guilty as I planned to wake myself up at 6am for study my law. But then it's still fine for me as I always feel that I am paying too much attention in class and I need some feedback, which is decrease my revision time. Owh, how could this ever appear in my mind? It's sound like I need some discount for my "revision". Too ridiculous for being a student like me.

Text-ed my beloved dear once I woke up but then he has disappear since morning until now. >.<" Neither curiosity nor worry as it's very normal for him to be disappear because he's always busy for......everything. @.@" I took my breakfast and shower after that I am sitting in front of my desk and try my best to study. Chapter 2: Sources of Malaysian law, very boring topic but I got no choice, have to treat it as a drug. I really worry about myself that I always distracted by lot of stuffs which neither of them are related to my study,keep consoling and persuading myself to treat study as a drug, an addiction of drug. But I just couldn't, once I look at the notes I miss my bed badly. The most important thing is that, I keep planning event for my holidays. I need holidays badly, I need to take a good rest!!!

Exam is something really torturing me. I am really wondering about why don't they just strike out examination and give students some tests and due to their performance in class to determine whether they are qualify to go through all the subjects and the next semester. This is more easier and more advocate about environment protection since it is paper saving and decrease the producing of papers. HAHA, k la, no more day dreaming, still have to face and sit for exam next Wednesday. 3 more subjects to go through perhaps? issshhhh.....

Good Luck everyone....

It was bored

I am proud to tell that the English Paper was under controlled. Section A was essay question and I have to choose one of the essay question among the two. Wrote about 500 words, done it in half an hour and yet the body of the story and the descriptions were not attractive enough to score 1A in 1119, but still confident to get an As' in Tar College. For the section B, it was comprehension and it was hell boring. Not easy, but not difficult too.>.> The article was talking about Jackie Chan's story and yet it bored me. I yawn several time as the questions of the comprehension sucks. I'm not bluffing, I fall asleep about half an hour while doing the comprehension questions.This is not a good reflection of a best student, but I admit that I'm not a good student. xD

I emphasize again, this English paper was hell boring. After I completed all the questions. There was still half an hour for me to wait until the exam end. I peeped around and I saw all the students were paying 100% attention on their paper. Felt a little bit guilty that I din't put much effort on this stupid paper but who cares? I'm sleepy man....=="

Well, forget about the exam. Let's talk about how was the plan going so far. Alright, it wasn't goes as smooth as what I expected. @.@" I studied, but...I just dint follow what I exactly planned. Not really effective but it was fine for my English paper, still a doubt for my Law paper. Hopefully, I can pass it if I memorize all the cases and Act. >.<" Okay, that's all for this post. Cya everyone.

Exam = suck